Conducting The Perfect ‘No-Strings Affair!

LOVE making is supposed to be private amongst lovers – but a lot have confessed to finding safe and private sex boring. That’s why a lot of adventurous lovers are finding ingenious ways of having sex. They find such methods exhilarating and maybe dangerous! So would you, could you do it on a plane? In a restaurant? And maybe three times a night? If your eyes are already popping out thinking how absurd these methods could be – there has been some real-life guide to having sex in the trickiest situation suggested by sexologists. Stuff even your lover won’t tell you! Have you ever thought of making love on a plane? With all these terrorist threats, attendants are not going to turn a blind eye while two people stuff themselves into a toilet. The only way to get busy on a plane these days is at your seat – and this is not really recommended! According to Franka who’s been a flight attendant for years: “I recently had a couple who had clearly just met, got frisky. Not long after take-off, she was up on his lap, covered up with a blanket. Not suitable. We flipped on the ‘fasten seat belt’ sign and walked through to make sure everyone was in their seat!” Nevertheless, if you must be amorous while air-bone, she suggests: .

(a) Be on a lone-haul flight, preferably a red-eye (the lights are dim; attendants tend to patrol the rows less often).
(b) Limit yourself to hands-on fun only, otherwise it’s really too obvious -and unfair to your neighbours.
(c) Cover up with a blanket or two. For the sake of future passengers, bring your own. With someone you really like for the first time, the advice is not to over think. “The key is not to read too much meaning into it,” says Laura, 36. “My first time with my now
 – husband was quick and not all that mind- blowing. And I didn’t care. I really wanted to get it behind us so we could clear the air of all those first-time nerves. After that, we could focus on learning what makes each other feel good. “Next move is to test the waters. I’ll treat him to unexpected oral sex, which takes the pressure off the intercourse. Knowing I’ve already seen – and approved of – the goodies gives him more confidence during the sex itself. Bonus for me! “Don’t forget to keep your sense of humour. Remember it is never like in the movies where things just fit perfectly. If something does go wrong – like the time I cracked my head on the headboard – it’s best just to laugh. It’ll make a great story when you’re reliving that first time.” But could you have a one-off with your ex? “The ex  is for ‘no expectations,’ says Ore 41. “You have to know that sex won’t fix whatever was wrong with your relationship or lead you to get back together. Consider why you want to go there. If it’s, say, to reassure yourself that you made the right decision to break up, beware – you might get brain-washed by intimacy. And by all means, avoid bringing him back to your place if you don’t want to ruin a perfectly relaxing morning cup of coffee by looking at him and shame-spiralling – because you might well do that. Don’t trust your own judgement? Ask your best friend what she thinks. It’s only fair since she’ll be the one dealing with the weeks of fallout if you get your heart broken again”. Should you make love when you’re not in the mood (but wish you were)? “Go for a massage,” advised Fatima, 42 year-old single mother. “A full- body rubdown makes me forget about whatever was stressing me out. And all that touching is amazing foreplay – even better if you have massage oil. He won’t mind doing it if he knows where it’s leading! And when I feel the least like a porn star, I act most like one. Wearing sexy lingerie, whispering a few sexy phrases, trying a new, crazy position all make the night fun and different and get us both revved up fast! “When I was married and my husband and I were trying to get pregnant, there were times I wasn’t in the mood, but we knew we had to do it. I would just conjure up sexy scenes, even if they were different from what was actually going on – like a steamy passage from a book – whatever got my juices flowing. » Are you thinking of having a friend-with-benefits with a co-worker ? “Whoever he is,” advices Ebele, 33, “make sure he doesn’t sit near you. You don’t want to look up every time he’s on the phone and wonder what other woman he’s talking to. You should also beware of the office party. Rational thinking fails if you’re drinking around co-workers. My guy and I got tipsy once at the Christmas party, he grabbed my butt and everyone saw!” Should you withhold sex until he apologises after you’ve had a fight? “Sex shouldn’t be used as a currency,” continues Ebele. “It’s not to be given or taken away as punishment or used to get something. In other words, do not turn your bed into the doghouse. In healthy relationships, sex is generally available with partners equally sharing the decision of when to do it. If it was just a stupid squabble, I try to immediately catapult the negative energy into sex that’s more passionate than usual.”